Inside: The day I found myself pregnant with a toddler at home should have been incredibly joyous! Except I didn't have one toddler - I had 3. And the news was overwhelming But there was one thing that I did everyday that kept me grounded. I know it will help you get through life's tough seasons, as well.  

It was spilling out of my mouth, warm and chunky. My stomach heaved and clenched as I bent over the toilet in the small bathroom of our 1950’s brick house. Three little bodies squished in the doorway, peering down quizzically at their poor mother hugging the toilet bowl. 

Not only did I have three toddlers (3, 2, and 18 months), but I was also pregnant.  And totally, unequivocally, miserable. 

A couple months before we had finished our foster care class and gotten the call for two little boys, brothers 1 and 2 years old, who needed a family. 

“How much time do we have to consider this?” we asked our social worker. 

They needed to be moved that night. If we said yes, they would be at our front door in 1-2 hours. 

We quickly said yes, even though this violated two of our self-imposed rules: 

• We would only take one child
• We would only consider taking a child who was younger than our biological son (who was 18 months at the time). 

But it felt right, so we said yes. Then one month later we found out that we were unexpectedly pregnant...and morning (really all day) sickness kicked in almost immediately.   

So there I found myself pregnant with a toddler - but not just one like I had imagined. I was now pregnant with 3 toddler boys running around the house. 

And thus began the longest four months of my life. 

But you know what? I made it. And if you are going through something difficult or overwhelming, you will make it, too.

When You Find Yourself Pregnant With A Toddler (Also Known As: When Life Gets Overwhelming)

And it will. There will come a time (if it hasn’t already come) when everything will seem to be going wrong and nothing will seem to come easy. Or when everything is going right - but the “right” is just really really difficult to walk through. 

According to a Gallup poll, 50% of stay at home moms say they feel stressed on a regular basis, and 43% admit that they are “struggling” in their role as “mom”. 

A lot of moms out there feel overwhelmed.

Are you there right now? If so, you will make it through. The days are long and hard, but one day you will look back and either laugh at the chaos, or take a deep breath and thank God for what you learned during this time. 

And it’s okay that it’s hard, but that doesn’t mean that you should wallow in the difficulties. Even though it is hard, you can still intentionally find ways to make room for things that matter to you and bring you joy.

What Kept Me Sane With Three Toddlers While Being Pregnant

There was one thing that kept me together even when I felt like giving up - a morning walk. 

My morning routine looked something like this:

5:00 AM head to the couch with my Bible and a cup of tea

5:45 AM lace up my shoes and head out the door, earphones and podcast in hand

6:30-6:45AM back home to a house full of kids!

I would walk through our middle class neighborhood, cross the street to a ritzier section of houses, head over to the nearby hospital, and then loop back home. 

It was the most calming, peaceful 50 minutes of my day. And without it, I might not have made it. 

That morning walk gave me:

• Space to breath and be thankful that I can stay home with my kids
• Time to process my thoughts
• Time alone to listen to encouraging and motivating podcasts
• The opportunity to keep my body physically active while pregnant
• Time to think and dream about passions outside of motherhood
• Quiet moments to talk to God

Those morning walks allowed me to remember why I chose to stay at home with my kids. I saw  people in their cars, rushing to work; and I watched men and women in suits or scrubs hustle out their door at daybreak, only to return home after dark . I noticed the unhappy faces of hospital employees as they parked their vehicles and headed inside for another long day. 

Those walks gave me time to be thankful that I was able to be at home with my kids - even when it was hard.

That 50 minutes was a non-negotiable for me. I knew if I wanted to mama well - if I wanted to have a positive perspective - then I needed that quiet time to myself in the mornings. 

The Key To Thriving Even When Life Gets Overwhelming

What kept me going was a morning walk. And a morning walk might be exactly what you need, as well. 

But it may not be a morning walk. It might be a hot cup of coffee on the porch every morning. Or it might be a quiet bubble bath after the kids go down. Or it could be an hour studying the Bible in the afternoons during nap time. Or time to sketch like you used to when you were in college. 

The key to thriving during difficult seasons is to find time and space to be alone, doing something that will energize you and give you a renewed sense of purpose. 

I can’t tell you exactly what that is going to be for you - you have to do some digging and testing to see what it is that inspires and rejuvenates you.

But when you do find it - do it! Make it a priority.

And that may mean that something else needs to be put to the side. Maybe the sink needs to stay full a little longer. Or you need to build a relaxing bedtime routine for yourself, get better sleep, and actually wake up before the kids!

 Or maybe you will have to ask for some help so that you can have some time to yourself. 

Either way, if you are in the middle of a season that is difficult, be diligent and consistent in finding some time and space to be alone and do something that stimulates your mind and creativity. 

How To Find Time Alone During Busy Seasons

If you aren’t sure where that time is going to come from, here are some ideas:

1. Start an energizing mom morning routine that you'll look forward to!
2. Be diligent in having a daily nap-time (or quiet time if your kids are older)
3. Go on a drive (with the kids strapped in and contained!)
4. Get your spouse to keep the kids while you go out
5. Schedule a babysitting swap with a friend - you keep her children for an hour and later she keeps yours. 
6. Look at Mother’s Day Out programs near you
7. Use bits of time within the margins of your day to do things that are motivating, not draining.

Life Might Feel Hard - But You Can Decide To Make It Better

Those 4 months with our two sweet foster sons were long. There were days that I didn’t want to get out of bed - the throwing up, the running around, the preparing meals, the visits from social workers, the dealing with tantrums, the family visits - it all seemed like too much. 

But my morning walk was always there, waiting for me, taking me to places that kept me grounded, positive, hopeful, and full of peace. 

So mama, maybe you are like me and find yourself pregnant with a toddler at home. Or maybe you are going through a totally different difficult season, find the thing that gives you joy - that thing that you can hold tight to. Be intentional about making time to be alone during your day. Do what you need to do to replenish, refresh, and get prepared for the days ahead. 

Your choices can either make this season harder, or they can make this season a time for learning and growing. I know right now you feel like you’re living right smack dab in the middle of the desert where it is always hot and dry. But I promise this is just a season - and the end will come. 

You’ve got this, mama. I’m here and rooting for you. 

Now go get some time to yourself!

I'm rooting for ya!