I’m glad you are back! And you're here for the best part...trust me, these are 14 self-care ideas for moms that you will NOT feel guilty about...
If you are not “back” and this is your first time here, go check out Part I and Part II of this series where we delve into the dangers of “self-care” for stay at home moms, and then talk about how to reframe your perspective on self-care for moms.
Go ahead - I’ll wait... 🙂
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Today is all about practical ideas for how you, as a stay at home mom, can practice “self-care” in a way that creates lasting, positive changes in your life. But first:
7 Self-care Ideas For Moms That Are Hurting More Than Helping
I know you are tired (both physically and mentally). I know you just want a few minutes of quiet. I know that motherhood can be stressful, loud, and sometimes suffocating.
But “quick fixes” and shallow self-care practices are not going to make the chaos any better. In fact, they are just going to keep you running on the hamster wheel - spinning frantically , but never making any real progress.
I am not saying that these practices should be avoided altogether - there is nothing inherently wrong with most of the ones I will list below. They are, however, poor substitutes for true “self-care”, the kind of self-care that brings energy, life, and joy.
So here is a quick and dirty list of popular self-care practices that won’t produce lasting change for you:
- Overindulging in sweets
- Binge watching a show
- Scrolling through social media
- Online shopping
- Staying up late in the name of getting the ever elusive “alone time”
- Sleeping in (at least until the kids wake up) every morning
- Scrolling through the news all day
Before we get into these self-care ideas for moms, let's talk about your mindset - it's everything!
Before we get into the self-care ideas for moms that will actually produce a positive impact on your life, I want to preface this by reminding you of a few mindset shifts that we talked about already:
- More of yourself will not help you with yourself
- Focus on pouring into others and allow God to pour into you
- Take time to figure out the root cause of stress or dissatisfaction - don’t try to disguise it with shallow fixes
- Proper self-care is a long term play
- True self-care treats your body with respect
- Lasting change happens when we form habits and practice discipline
14 Self-Care Ideas For Moms That Actually Work
1. Spend time in the Word
If you are a believer, you have to be in the Word. God has promised to take of you and me - we need to give Him the space to do that. If you need help getting into the habit of being in Scripture, here are some helpful tips to starting a quiet time.
2. Volunteer for a cause
Getting out of our own heads is key to enjoying life and taking good care of yourself. The best way to do that? Give your time and energy away to others in your community. I get that you are already pouring into your kids - but getting out in your community and helping those who have trouble helping themselves...it just really is one of the best ways to get out of the mom funk.
3. Journal
There is something about writing that is so therapeutic. I find that when I write, emotions and truths come out that I didn’t know were there before. So sit down with a pen and paper, or a laptop if you prefer, and just start writing. Let it out. Feel as you write. Enjoy the process. If your not sure where to start, check out these thought provoking prompts.
4. Workout
Even if it is just for 10 minutes in the morning, take some time during the day to intentionally move your body. I wrote a series on staying fit as a stay at home mom a few weeks ago - check it out for more tips, tricks, and practical advice for staying fit as a stay at home mom.
5. Eat intentionally
I had a win today (which I needed after my downfall yesterday…) - after putting my boys down for a nap I desperately wanted to whip up a quick bowl of chocolate batter and stuff myself with the gooey goodness. Like, I could feel my body lunging towards the cabinet. It felt so necessary.
But instead of frantically pulling flour, butter, chocolate, and sugar out of the cupboard, I resisted (which isn’t always like me).
And now, it’s 7:20 PM, and I am so glad that I did.
Be intentional about what you are eating. If you are like me, when nap-time rolls around you will feel a sudden urge to eat junk. Don’t do it. If you can get past that “window” of craving, you will be so glad that you resisted. And your body will thank you.
6. Wake up early
I am convinced that if moms built this one habit it would totally change how most of us feel about our day at home with little ones. Waking up early is hard. But with discipline and consistency, it can easily become the most anticipated part of your day.
7. Go to bed early
So many moms I talk to say they wish they could start an early morning routine, but they “can’t” because they just need more sleep “than that”. I’m not sure what “than that” means, but it is totally doable to get good sleep and still wake up early.
Going to bed early is a huge part of that. And really, how many of us are using those night hours for something that is truly beneficial, anyway?
8. Start (or continue) a hobby
We have chosen to be stay at home moms for various reasons, and that is our job and our love and passion. But I bet there are some things that you secretly (or very loudly) wish you had more time for.
Whatever that is for you, find a way to start doing that again. Maybe it is running, or knitting, or baking bread, or writing, or painting. Early mornings are a good time to work on a hobby, or at night after the kids go down.
This is important for you mama, so figure out a way to shift your schedule so that you can work on a project that you WANT to work on. God gave you that desire and passion for a reason...
9. Read a book
Choose reading over watching a show or mindlessly scrolling social media. Reading engages our brains in a totally different way than watching something does. And you get a sense of accomplishment as well. Check out these recommended books if you need a place to start!
10. Make a new friend
I know, for me, making a new friend as mom can be hard. Especially when you add moving into the equation - you constantly feel like you have to start over. But having good solid mom friends is VITAL to thriving as a mom.
And by good, solid friends, I’m not talking about the “friend” who keeps writing you on Facebook to tell you about her new “business” - but then goes ghost silent when you finally let her know that you are really not interested in buying vitamins...
She is not a friend.
I’m talking about friends with the same values, friends that care about you, friends that open up and share and love others.
11. Talk to a friend on the phone
Texting is great. I love how easy and quick it is (ok, if I’m being real, I really don’t like texting…), but talking on the phone to a friend is so much more rejuvenating, personal, and allows for a much deeper connection (and most of us could use some deep connection).
It feels awkward these days to call someone - we are so used to the more distant forms of communication. But try it. I think you will find it to be more fruitful than you think.
12. Memorize Scripture
Yes, this sounds super boring, I’m not going to lie. Who wants to spend their 30 minutes alone memorizing Bible verses? I want to do something fun, by golly!
But we are talking about self-care that results in lasting change, and memorizing Scripture is one of the most important ways that you can be filled with truth, wisdom, peace, and joy.
13. Get outside everyday (rain or shine)
Even if it is just for 15 minutes - get outside. Your kids will thank you, and 90% of the time you will feel (even if it just a tad bit) more refreshed.
“There is always something beautiful outside” - unknown
It's raining? Play under a covering or let them run around in the rain while you sit on the deck (then throw them in the bath). Cold? Layer up, baby.
Make it a goal to be outside for 15 minutes everyday, no matter what the weather. You may not feel like it now, but once you get up and get out you will be glad that you did. So just do it.
14. Rest in the silence
When I am alone, I tend to turn on a podcast about as quickly as a cat pounces on a lone bird. I love listening to podcasts...but I have noticed that I can also overdo it.
Sometimes the best thing that you can do for yourself is let the silence sit. You might be laughing right now….silence can feel almost non-existent for many of us with little ones. But next time you are alone, resist the temptation to turn on music, a show, or a podcast. Enjoy being quiet. It will clear your head and reset your mind.
When Crafting Your Self-Care Routine, Choose Lasting Change Over The Quick Fix
The quick fix will feel good in the moment, but will ultimately leave you less full. The 14 self-care ideas for moms that we have talked about today WILL re-energize and rejuvenate you.
Taking care of yourself requires hard work - but so does everything in life worth going after. Don’t let yourself always choose the easy route - choose what seems harder, less fun, and more “serious”. Choose what is best, in the long run, for you, your family, and your friends. These 14 self-care ideas for moms will help you do that.
You can’t truly love others and pour yourself out unless you are being loved and poured into. Give God the chance to do that - let Him love and fill you. Even when you don’t feel like it.
Thanks for sticking with me. I would love to hear from you about what has worked for you in terms of “self-care”. What do you do to make sure that you are the best mom, wife, and friend that you can be? What gives you energy? What gives you joy? What fills you?
I'm rooting for you!
