Inside: 3 simple tips to bring you more laughter, stronger connection, and a deeper relationship with your kids. Learn how to have fun with your kids!
Remember those days when full-on belly laughing seemed like a daily staple? When laughing so hard you could hardly breathe happened on a regular basis?
Oh I miss those days.
It recently hit me that I had not belly laughed in a while - and I love to laugh.
But then, just a few days later, I found myself crumpled on the trampoline in a fit of laughter with my 3-year old.
It was a rainy day and just the two of us were jumping together - my younger son was still napping hard.
“Not day after day! Another cheese sandwich and I am going to turn into a mouse!” My 3 year old cackled as he quoted a scene from one of his favorite shows, The Berenstain Bears.
This little quip came out of nowhere, for no apparent reason. And he almost lost his ability to breathe because he was laughing so hard at himself.
Seeing him laugh so hard, and at the same time being amazed at how old he is getting, I started laughing too. Laughing so hard that I tumbled onto the trampoline and almost peed on myself.
We laid there belly laughing for what felt like a full 15 minutes.
Laughter is medicine
Laughter is healing. It helps us remember what is good and forget the hard things that might be going on. It brings us closer to those we are laughing with.
So what brought on our sudden laughing fit? At first glance, I guess it was his little recitation. But behind the scenes there was more to it than that.
It is possible for us to learn how to have more moments like this - more moments where we find ourselves unashamedly belly laughing with our kids. And if there is a way I can have more of that, I’m in! How about you? I think we could all use a few more belly laughs this year….
4 Ways To Have Fun With Your Kids
1. Say “yes” more often
Several months ago, my church hosted a women’s lunch for ladies looking to be more involved in discipleship.
This was what I needed - discipleship. But everything in me wanted to skip this lunch. I was still dealing with still reeling from a recent hurt, and sitting around at church with a group of women talking about how good God is was the last thing that I wanted to do (for the record, God is good. All the time).
But I pulled myself together and did what I knew was the best thing instead of what felt best. I went. I said yes.
I spent most of the 2 hours wishing I could bolt out of the door and head home.
But I did end up sitting at a table getting to know another woman who I might not have met otherwise. And later, without knowing what I was going through and feeling, she shared her story with me - the story of a year that turned out to be a nightmare for her.
What I learned from her, and heard her say, was such an encouragement to me in a time when I needed some encouragement.
If I had said “no” that afternoon, I would have missed out on that friendship.
And every time you say “no” to your kids, you might be missing out on the opportunity to make a lasting connection with them.
That 20 minutes of belly laughter on the trampoline started with a “yes”. A “yes” to jump with my son when everything in me wanted to say “no”.
I would venture to say that almost every belly laugh moment you have with your kids is going to be the result of a “yes” that you gave them. A yes to listening more closely; a yes to playing a board game; a yes to doing a puzzle together; a yes to playing tag.
Let’s vow to each other that we will say “yes” more often.
2. Stop looking at the clock
I like a schedule - I bet you do, too.
A few weeks ago, my boys and I were headed back to the car after a morning walk when we came across a large puddle in the mud.
“Stop, mama - look!” my son called.
But it was close to lunchtime (and naptime) and I was already hustling to get back to the car so that we could stay on schedule.
“Mama, look!”.
Irritated, I stopped and said, “just for a sec, then let’s go!”
We ended up spending the next 15 minutes watching about 1 million tadpoles dance around the muddy water. Even I was fascinated.
We went back to the puddle every day that week to check on them. We watched videos about tadpoles at home, and talked non stop about what those tadpoles were doing and where they were going to go once they turned into frogs.
While I am all for a good schedule, being so stringent can hold us back from being in the moment and enjoying random things with our kids.
It’s good to have a routine, but it is not good to be ruled by one.
Because when we are more open and more available - more focused on what we are doing instead of where we are going and what time it is - we will find more opportunities for to have fun with our kids.
3. Study ways to make them laugh
Laughter is contagious.
Study your children to see what makes them laugh. Because when they laugh, you will inevitably start laughing more, too.
And once you learn what tickles them the most - do more of that!
You have probably heard the piece of marriage advice that says: if you want a full and thriving marriage then you must be constantly studying your spouse.
I think the same goes for your relationship with your kids - we must continue to study them in order to learn more about who they are and who they are becoming.
A couple of months ago, at my grandparents house, my son discovered Tom and Jerry. And I’m not sure I have ever seen him laugh so hard at a TV screen. He loved the physical comedy.
So I started trying to emulate. When we would jump on the trampoline together I would do crazy faces and jumps and moves - and he loved it. He would laugh so hard, and his laughter would inevitably get me in stitches.
There are things that tend to make your kids laugh more than others. How can you figure out what those things are?
- Sit and watch them play - see what makes them smile and chuckle
- Notice what makes them giggle while they are watching their favorite show
- Pay attention to what makes them smile while you read books together
4. Wake up early
Right after college, my husband and I spent a few months house sitting for our college professor. One of the requirements - we had to keep their plants alive.
They obviously didn’t know me that well.
Every day I would carefully measure out a specified amount of water for each plant (nearly 30 all crammed in a small patio).
Until my husband's aunt came to visit one evening. She grabbed the hose and proceeded to flood the entire patio, spraying up in the air and all around until the entire area was flooded and water was seeping out of the bottom of each plant.
“That’s all you need to do.” She told me. “Isn’t that easier?”
We are a lot like those plants needing to be watered and nurtured. When we are full - when our soil has been thoroughly soaked - we can more effortlessly overflow and pour out into others.
Waking up early before the kids gives you time to be thoroughly filled and nurtured, so that you can then be more free to have fun with your kids.
And when you are full and energized and motivated, you can then say yes more often, stop worrying about the clock so much, study your kids more closely, and laugh more loudly.
Mama, Let’s Laugh More With Our Kids
Laughter is medicine. And laughter has the power to bring people together. So use laughter to connect more deeply with your kids. Be intentional and deliberate about bringing more laughter into their life, and yours. Strive to have fun with your kids, everyday. How?
- Say ‘yes’ more often
- Stop looking at the clock so much - sometimes the schedule can wait!
- Study what makes them laugh
- Wake up before the kids - create space for your heart to be filled up so that you can pour out into them
Can you think of the last time you and your kiddo truly had a belly laugh together? If so, we would all love to hear the story! Comment below and share it with the rest of us.
Now it’s time to go laugh some more, today. Go and have fun with your kids.
I’m rooting for you,
