Inside: If you are exhausted from the endless days of dishes, laundry, playing, and mopping, this is for you: the stay at home mom daily routine that'll add more margin and calm to your day.
Being a stay-at-home mom is a rewarding and fulfilling role, but it can also be incredibly demanding. Between taking care of kids, managing household chores, playing and engaging with your little ones, and trying to keep up with responsibilities outside of your family, it's easy to feel overwhelmed.
Chaos is what seems to rule your home.
This is not what you envisioned when you first became a stay at home mom.
There is hope mama! With a few simple tweaks and intentionality, you can transform your daily routine from chaos to calm.
Whether you're a new mom or a seasoned pro, these tips will help you streamline your daily schedule, boost productivity, and make the most of your time with your family. So let's dive in and take the first step towards a more organized and fulfilling life as a stay-at-home mom.
The challenges of being a stay-at-home mom
Several years ago my husband and I visited Istanbul, Turkey, and a scene from a market comes to mind when I think about being a stay at home mom.
We hopped over puddles and our boots smashed into the mud as we got closer to the Sunday market. From the distance it looked like a jumbled, unorganized mess of fruit, household goods, clothes, cheese, toys, and people - all crammed in together. Chaos.
We weren't quite to the entrance, and I already was feeling overwhelmed.
Days at home with kids can feel a lot like that market in the center of bustling Istanbul - crowded, loud, filled with smells you could do without, and chaotic.
Here are some daily challenges of being a stay at home mom:
- constant interruptions (you can't seem to finish a task!)
- feeling isolated and alone
- lack of motivation
- not having a structure or daily schedule
- balancing spending time with you kids, getting household chores done, and having your own interests and hobbies
The importance of having a daily schedule
From far away, the market tables looked unordered and chaotic. But once we got closer I could make out the individual stalls, with individual vendors, each with their own individual structures.
The farther we got into the market, the more orderly it felt. Instead of a white tent slammed to the edges with bread, clothes, electronics, and pistachios, it became apparent it was a grid of little stalls, each with its own purpose and identity.
Likewise our days as stay at home moms, though they may look chaotic from the outside, can be intentionally organized and structured in a purposeful way.
The key is just that: we have to be intentional.
As mamas we have no problem putting our kids on a schedule - we have their bedtimes and wake up times set and we make sure we stick to them. We read books, listen to podcasts, follow Instagram accounts...
We know that children function best under a routine.
At some point along the way we decide routine doesn’t really apply to us as adults. But guess what, mama? Even as adults we thrive when our days follow a rhythm and cadence.
A stay at home mom daily routine will keep you sane. Without a predicable rhythm, the day of a SAHM can quickly feel unending, monotonous, and, frankly, boring. A daily schedule can help you:
- stay on track
- prioritize your tasks
- identify time wasters
- keep you sane
- enjoy being a mom at home with your kids!
- manage the chaos
- feel more in control
- stop the hamster-on-a-wheel feeling
A schedule can help ensure you are getting what is most important for your family done.
A daily stay at home mom routine that keeps your priorities in order and sets a cadence to the day will make your family life more peaceful, rich, and life-giving.
Benefits of organizing your daily schedule
Organizing your schedule can help you reduce stress and overwhelm. When you have a clear plan for the day, you can feel more in control and less likely to be caught off guard by unexpected events.
While having a schedule might feel confining, it's actually freeing when you have a structure in place. It's like a flag pole - strong, steady, and firm. Because it is steady, the flag itself is free to be blown about by the wind. Free, but anchored.
Your daily stay at home mom routine will give you a framework for your days, so the in-betweens can filled with fun, laughter, and maybe a little time to yourself 🙂
A few other benefits of having a daily routine:
- get quiet time alone everyday
- enjoy evenings with your husband
- manage (not eliminate!) the chaos
- fit in time to pursue some of your own interests
- create a more calm atmosphere in your home
Daily routines will also allow you opportunities to work on other goals you may have like learning a new skill, eating more healthy meals, starting a workout routine, writing, crafting - you name it!
>>> Read: Hobbies for stay at home moms
7 Tips for creating a calm stay at home mom daily routine
Creating a daily schedule can be challenging, but it's essential for staying organized and productive. Here are some tips to help you create a daily schedule that works for you:
1. Set realistic goals for your daily routine
When creating a daily schedule, it's important to set realistic goals. Be honest with yourself about how much you can accomplish in a day, taking into account your other responsibilities and any interruptions that may occur. Setting unrealistic goals can lead to frustration and a sense of failure.
Some goals might be:
- have the kids in bed by 8 PM
- get one "extra" cleaning task done
- have the dishwasher emptied before dinner
- schedule at least one play date a week
- get outside every day
2. Determine your anchors
If you have never been rock climbing before it goes like this: there are predetermined anchors drilled into the rock that the climber can hook into as they ascend. This way if a climber falls, they only fall to the last anchor instead of the entire height of the rock face.
The anchors are the safety points - the places on the climb where the climber can take a deep breath and a quick rest.
As moms, we need our own anchors - points in our day we can count on. Little routines that we can grab onto and hug tight when the days get chaotic.
Some examples of anchors:
- mid-day quiet time/nap time
- afternoon snack
- kid's bedtime
- 8 AM Bible reading with your kids
- 3 PM cup of tea
Anchors should be set. Stick to them. When my kids were younger, it didn't matter what was going on, we were always home to start nap-time by noon. I said no to many things and left some events or playdates early to make sure our date with quiet time was never missed!
Take some time to identify and write down what anchors you need in your day.
3. Use a daily brain dump
You've got about ten thousand things going on in one day? Me, too. And when the day gets going and kids get needy and dishes need to be washed, it's far too easy to slip into the spiral of overwhelm.
At the beginning of the day (or the night before) grab a piece of paper and jot down all those thoughts, tasks, appointments, playdates, to-dos, and want-tos of your day. Once they are written down you can take a minute to roughly organize them into a schedule.
Include your predetermined "anchors" in your schedule as well. Fill the times between your "anchors' with your brain-dumped list.
4. Create bookends for your day
Your morning routine and night time routine are both anchors, but they deserve a little special attention - a good morning routine can make or break your day. A nighttime routine has a massive effect on the quality of sleep you get. Both are key - because if you start the day off cranky, or don’t get enough sleep at night, you've already begun a few steps behind.
Create little routines or rhythms at the beginning and end of your day. What that looks like will be different for everyone, but they should be life-giving rhythms you look forward to.
For me, my morning routine includes:
- spending time in Scripture
- prayer
- writing
- a workout
- shower
My evening routine includes:
- reading a good book before bed/a show
- spending time with Lance
- shower
If you've determined your anchors and have filled in the space between the anchors with your brain-dumped list items, you should have time in the evening to relax (instead of cleaning up and finishing off tasks for the day).
Your morning and nighttime routine might look totally different than mine- and that is OK. Design something that you look forward to!
5. Identify time-wasters and distractions
Identifying time-wasters and distractions is key to managing your time effectively. Do you spend too much time scrolling through Instagram throughout your day? Do you get distracted by phone calls or emails?
Pin point those distractions and take steps to minimize them. Here are some ideas:
- time block your day (keep reading, because that's the next tip!)
- have a phone station in your house
- finish what you start (just put the laundry away!)
- designate a texting time (instead of shooting off texts all day long)
- keep track of how you spend your time for a few days (in 15 minute increments). You might be surprised where your time is going!
- learn to say no!
6. Use time-blocking
Time blocking just means sectioning out certain times in your day for certain tasks. And then finishing the task you start.
For example:
- 8:00 AM - 9:00 AM get household chores done (laundry, dishes, etc).
- 10:00 AM -11:30 AM play with the kids or take an outing
- 12:30 PM - 13:00 PM mail, appointments, finances, etc.
- 6:00 PM - 7:00 PM clean kitchen and kids get ready for bed
More than anything, what this means is: learn when to say yes and when to say no. Teach your kids to respect your time and your tasks, as well. Obviously this won't work with infants, but once they start to understand "no!" you can begin to train them in this.
Unless you can tell your kids "not right now! let me finish _______ and then I'll help you _________", time blocking just won't work.
7. Wake up before your kids
Have you ever wished you could:
- have time alone each day in the quiet with your Father
- work on a dream or passion, uninterrupted
- get a workout in
- drink a hot cup of coffee in one sitting
- welcome the kids to the day fresh and alert
If the answer is yes! it's time to start your own mama's morning routine. Waking up before the kids helps you to get a little time to yourself, prepare for the day, and have smile on when your little ones get up!
And you know what else? Waking up as "Kelsey, child of God" vs. "Mama! Mama! Mama!" really does change the trajectory of the whole day 🙂
>>> Read: The 15 Minute Morning For Moms
An real stay at home mom's daily routine
Here's a rough daily schedule for me and my boys. Disclaimer: this was our daily schedule when both boys were at home. My oldest has since started school, so it looks a little different now, but it's still not far off.
Morning routine
5:00 AM - 7:00 AM My own morning routine which always includes a cup of tea and reading the Bible + prayer and then either a workout or time writing
7:00 AM - 7:30 AM Reading the Bible, together with the boys, on the couch (this one is great for toddlers/preschoolers, and this one is wonderful for preschoolers or kids who are a little older)
7:30 AM - 8:00 AM Breakfast
8:00 AM - 9:00 AM Household chores (sometimes the kids help with this, sometimes they will just play).
Mid-morning play
9:00 AM - 11:00 AM(ish) Go on an outing, do a fun project at home, or get together with friends
11:30 AM - 12:00 PM Lunch (tip: pre-pack lunches the night before or the morning of to make lunchtime quick and easy!)
Quiet Time
12:00 PM - 2:00 PM Quiet time/nap time (during this time I write or work on the blog)
Afternoon Routine
2:00 PM -3:00 PM Snack and reading together
3:00 PM - 4/4:30 PM Short outing or play at home
4:30 PM - 5:15 PM Get dinner ready
Evening/Bedtime Routine
5:15 PM - 5:45 PM Dinner
5:45 PM - 6:30 PM Clean up kitchen while my husband helps with the boys bath/gets them ready for bed
6:30 PM - 7:00 PM Reading books in bed with the boys
7:00 PM Goodnight kiddos!
7:00 PM - 9:00 PM a relaxing bedtime routine for my husband and me
Why your kids will thrive when you have a daily routine as a mom
A daily routine for you, as a stay at home, is important to help you stay focused, be intentional, engage deeply with your kids, and fight the monotony of being a stay at home mom!
Your kids will also benefit from your daily rhythm. They will feel your calm. They will also feel your chaos. Getting yourself into a daily routine as a stay at home mom will give your kids a sense of security and stability in knowing what to expect.
Having a stay at home mom schedule is a win-win!
>>> Read: 101 Journal Prompts for Moms
Conclusion
Being a stay-at-home mom is a challenging but rewarding role. By organizing your daily schedule, you can manage your time more effectively, reduce stress and overwhelm, and engage deeply with your family - the way you dreamed you would years ago, before kids were actually in your home.
Hold these tips loosely, and remember this is a schedule for you and your family. So tailor it so it works best for y'all.
- Set realistic goals for your schedule
- Determine your anchors
- Practice a daily brain dump
- Create life-giving bookends for your day
- Identify time-wasters
- Use time-blocking
- Wake up before the kids
With a little planning and effort, you can transform your daily routine from chaotic to calming.
As always, I'm rooting for you!
